MAYVILLE, ENGLAND – In a wave of “Grossly Offensive” attacks towards Dr. Who’s writing and timing of 50 years to establish The Doctor as being from a Species of Puffin like Humanoids.
They have expanded Dankula’s Law to apply Grossly Offensive in the 3rd Degree to anyone mocking bad writing in Dr Who while a woman plays The Doctor. “Sure it’s not rape, but if offends our sensibilities,” Cried Chibnall, the only writer willing to to stay, “It doesn’t matter if we are good at what we do, we need people to wat…I mean…she’s a woman.”
When asked why it wasn’t done 32 years ago, he replied, “Those sexists where too busy showing off adventurous career women, they never thought one could be male Scientist from another world.” He went on to take credit for being the first man to make a central female character who hunt evil Aliens, Ridley Scott was not available for comment.
When asked why the Death Penalty, Boris Johnson said, “No one should be able to get away for hurtful jokes and comments, it’s just not British, like the smelly Niqab people.” “The UK will not tolerate them making fun of or refuting the merits of a woman Doctor,” Boris said, “The BBC is scared, they already messed up Top Gear, they have nothing else to promote!” he went on, and on, and on, and on, to say, “Besides, A Woman, did I mention a diverse set of male writers?” “We did a lot for men, it use to be the Male to Female regular cast was 2 Females to 1 Male, now it’s 50/50.” He also said all complaints about the “End of Daffyness complaints are racist and punishable by death.”
When asked if a woman should do his job, he said, “Fuck no! But not that I am sexist, just, well, I’m not good at anything, what else would I do?”
When Chibnall was asked of the short life span of the last Actor’s incarnation, he said, “Who cares about some Scot with a wop name, now at least it’s a proper English name on the credits.”
When asking if the Death Penalty was a little extreme, many politicians and activists said the same thing, “but it’s a woman.”
One thing is for sure, no one is safe in the UK without a MP Seat or Knighthood.