PEDWOOD, FL – Despite being arrested in France, and not sharing a flight with Polanski back to the US, Jeffrey Epstein, 56, has a new defense. His lawyers stated that he is a proud Minor Attracted Person (MAP).

MAPs who are all the rage on mainstream Social Media, promote the lifestyle of being attracted to and even claiming that some don’t act on it (NOMAP).
“We are to be respected and celebrated for our intersectiional lifestyle,” tweeted Pure Joy and Happiness, “We love young children what is the sin in love?”
The the bizarre Social Media advocacy only foreseen by South Park in “Cartman Joins NAMBLA,” and Slippery Slope Doom Sayer Rick Santorum is spreading like wild fire, leaving more exposure for these men and women.
So will it work? Will Epstein get off, will he even be aquitted? Only time will tell.